I’ve told the news “no” several times, but it just keeps coming at me!
That’s how I’ve felt over the past few weeks, with something new happening every damn second of every damn day. Hell, Republicans trying to redefine rape was even in the news.
From Libya to Japan to Republicans trying to get their shit together to find someone who can maybe take on President Obama in 2012, I’m beat. I don’t want anymore, but News isn’t taking no for an answer.
Being of the Twitter variety, I see the outrage from both sides on a daily basis. Liberals are going after the injustices of this or that, while conservatives continually mock a President they wouldn’t support in a 100 meter race against Gaddafi and someone equally evil from Sudan. I as a satirical writer (not an activist or supporter of any political party FOR THE BILLIONTH TIME!) try to bring some levity to trying times such as these, but it has seemed like a fruitless exercise as of late. Everyone on both sides of the spectrum is just getting more and more outraged over every little damn thing, blinded by partisan tunnel vision. So here’s what I purpose.
Go take a hike! …No, seriously. Go take a hike. Get off your computer, away from twitter and experience some of good ole Mother Earth! She’s without political ideology and won’t eloquently call you a “tard” for disagreeing with Her. Heck, she might even bless you with some sunshine, putting your worries to the side for a few hours.
Liberals, Sarah Palin knows you don’t like her. Conservatives, we get you loathe everything President Obama does, perhaps even the way he excuses himself to go to the restroom. We, the majority of the country who don’t feel the need to express political outrage in every tweet, facebook status and/or breath, would appreciate a break from your constant outrage. Because it’s your constant outrage that fuels these partisan news stories. And if you so much as utter an unwanted news-advance on me, I’m blowing my news-whistle!